Smiling in Year 2, 1st Quarter

Walking through campus on a perfect Fall day makes me smile and sigh to be in the right place, doing the right thing at the right time of my life.

Last year felt like an exam and thankfully, I passed.
How bad did I want it? Because it was going to get rough.
Did I want it bad enough and for the right reasons?

This quarter has been completely different. It took all summer to detox from the storm and stress that was the first year. Now I feel I am enjoying a respite quarter even though I am still doing the work. My class and work assignments are serving double and sometimes triple duty which streamlines my time and energy and makes everything relevant and interconnected.

The reading and assignments last year were overwhelming and dense - had me studying 10-12 hours a day for seven days a week! This year the load and articles feel light and readable. It's been harder to focus but I manage to get assignments done. I am dancing, walking, playing tennis and going to the gym a whole lot more - not sitting nearly as much.

People ask if I am just feeling better adjusted to the work-school-family balance. Maybe. But everything feels transformed. It is a whole new day.

I am glad I hung in there despite nagging thoughts of wanting to quit - to get off the roller coaster. The future seems open and hopeful. I am looking forward to what comes next. I am grateful to be putting my talents to use in this way. I am glad to respond to the call of research. I want to know how things work and how to do things better.

If you are thinking about taking on a challenge - whatever it is - take the leap of faith. What's the worst thing that can happen? Making mistakes at first is guaranteed and need not be feared to the point of paralysis. Nobody gets to be perfect. When we are learning something new we need to be kind and patient with ourselves. It does get better. There is a reason you are dreaming of taking that step. Your heart and imagination are pulling you toward something that will bring you closer to yourself. That is what we are here for. The 80-year old in us will not regret it one bit.