"We develop a way of life that embraces and blends the concepts of self-nurturing and self-discipline. We love ourselves in all the ways we need and deserve to be loved; we discipline ourselves in ways that will be in our own best interests. We become our own best friend and parent.
...Nurturing is an attitude toward ourselves - one of unconditional love and acceptance. I'm talking about loving ourselves so much and so hard the good stuff gets right into the core of us, then spills over into our lives and our relationships. I'm talking about loving ourselves no matter what happens or where we go.
In the morning and throughout our day, we lovingly and gently ask ourselves what we can do for ourselves that would feel good. We ask ourselves what we need to do to take care of ourselves. When we hurt, we ask what would help us feel better. We give ourselves encouragement and support. We tell ourselves we can do it, we can do it good enough, and things will work out. When we make a mistake, we tell ourselves that's okay. We wait a moment, until we get our balance back, and then we ask ourselves if there's something we can learn from our mistake, or if there's some way we can improve our conduct in the future, or if there's an amend we need to make.
We tell ourselves we love and accept ourselves...We make ourselves feel safe and loved."
Beyond Codependency: and getting better all the time by Melody Beattie