Friday, December 29, 2017

Social Work Super Powers

Social Workers have many super powers, you realize. Here are two...

1. Empathy

This means truly and deeply understanding and accepting the thoughts and feelings of another. It feels amazing and powerful. When was the last time you experienced empathy - when someone understood and accepted you completely? It makes you feel sane and connected, no matter what story you have to tell.

In the book, Confessions of a Sociopath, by M.E. Thomas, the author notes that most people confuse sex with love but what really feels like love is being understood. When I read this, I thought, that is our super-power as social workers! And like any power, it can be used for good or evil.

Manipulators use empathy to take advantage of their target. Manipulators find it easier to get whatever they ask for from someone who thinks they are understood, accepted, and in love. This game ends when the target taps into their own deep well of self-love. Self-acceptance and self-love trump fake love and empathy from a manipulator.

Social workers practice empathy because it is healing. Sometimes there are no words and empathy is all you've got to give. Fortunately, it's plenty powerful.

2. Exploring Ambivalence 

We feel ambivalent about everything.
We love and hate our parents.
If notified about a $20,000 raise and promotion, we would feel both excited and scared at the same time - What will be expected of me? Can I rise to the challenge? Will I succeed or fail?
The main obstacle standing between us and our biggest dream or deepest desire is our ambivalence. One of my mentors taught me to explore ambivalence in order to release it's grip on goals.
Exploring ambivalence involves asking about and bringing to light all fears, worries, doubts, questions, and concerns. We can address them when we acknowledge them. Facing fears, worries, doubts, questions, and concerns is important if we are to start the journey to our promised land.

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