Self-Mastery after Trauma

Still reading, The Body Keeps the Score, by Van Der Kolk and taking notes...

How do you become the master of your own ship after trauma? Van Der Kolk has been studying and treating trauma for over 30 years. He summarizes what he has seen work:

• Talking
• Understanding
• Medications can dampen hyperactive alarm systems in the body
• Having physical experiences that directly contradict the helplessness, rage, and collapse that are part of trauma

I love the sound of that treatment plan. 

It's okay to talk about it - make sense of it and sort out feelings. It helps to create a coherent story -with a beginning, middle, and end - with lots of details about the good, the bad, and the horribly beautiful. 

Storytelling helps to develop an understanding and empathy for self and others. Sharing or reading stories is powerful because you start to see patterns and commonalities. There are common reactions to stress and trauma. Instead of judging or feeling out of control, you develop an acceptance and understanding of yourself and others - it can bring peace.

Medications are more stigmatized and feared than alcohol, pot, and street-level drugs. How did that happen? I am not afraid of taking advantage of anything and everything that is safe and good for my well-being, including medication that calms by hyperactive alarm system. I like sleeping soundly. I like being at peace in my own body. I like not reacting to everything like it's an emergency. I like screening what I want to focus on and put my energy and attention to - it makes me feel in control and not helpless.

Most intriguing is the idea that having physical experiences that directly contradict the feelings associated with traumatic events can help recovery. It sounds like what Peter Levine talks about in Waking the Tiger. Summarized brusquely, he asserts (based on his work with clients) that when the body freezes in a traumatic event, it later needs to follow-through with the movement in order to recover. This idea about having physical experiences also reminds me of how healing it is for some survivors of tragedy to set up a foundation and pursue social justice goals as a means of recovery.  Sometimes we just gotta do something to counter and challenge the feeling of helplessness. Seeking justice (and not revenge) can be an antidote for the rage.

Regaining self-mastery is the ultimate goal of trauma recovery. Addictions of all kinds are a short-cut to soothe the pain of trauma memories. Unfortunately, the side effects of addiction are feeling out of control and shame, which is farther away from self-mastery and recovery.