Ask

Many novice teachers believe that if they ask for assistance, they will appear incompetent or poorly prepared (Tait, 2008). The same can be said for social workers at any stage, I think.

The irony.

Let's examine incompetence. The definition from Merriam-Webster's Online Dictionary is:
1 : not legally qualified
2 : inadequate to or unsuitable for a particular purpose
3 a : lacking the qualities needed for effective action b : unable to function properly

I prefer to summarize incompetence as I don't know or I don't have the skills, right now or for the time being. This doesn't mean never or forever, unless of course, I never ask and never practice, indefinitely. Maybe we secretly hope that someone else will ask. Let them take the hit. But what if no one does. Then what? Doomed to never know? Remain incompetent? Yikes, what a sad lot. In this scenario, not only do I work without adequate tools, I make my job harder than it already is and expend more energy with less than desired results. In this way, I miss out on rewards and satisfaction (all risks for burnout). Now my students get less than, when they really need the best available. I can see why we resist evaluation or accountability in this scenario. It's like the person who doesn't want to open up the credit card bills because they don't want to know what they really owe. What a tangled web we weave...

Not knowing is an inevitable but temporary condition. We all have the capacity to know. How long it takes is the particular.

The irony is that the person who asks is not the dumbest in the room, she or he is potentially the most courageous. It takes a lot to be vulnerable. The payoff is the knowledge gained.

What gets me is not the person that doesn't know and is willing to learn by asking for help. What gets to me is the person who is unskilled but acts like they know it all already - as a defense against the pain of not knowing - and refuses to learn. That is ignorance. It can be a little dangerous.

"Ignorance is the state in which one lacks knowledge, is unaware of something or chooses to subjectively ignore information. This should not be confused with being unintelligent, as one's level of intelligence and level of education or general awareness are not the same." (from wikipedia: ignorance)

So ask already - take one for the team and raise the consciousness in the room. Do it for Johnny. ;)